Routine is a problem.
I like to be impulsive and Asperger’s means Alfie likes routine. This means we clash a LOT!
Sticking to routine is one of the things I find the most difficult to cope with when it comes to Asperger’s. The trouble with routine is I don’t know how to stick to one. This is where we encounter the most issues if i’m totally honest.
The problem I have is that one minute I could be sat reading something and the next minute decide I needed to go shopping. This never went down well! Alfie absolutely hated it and I virtually had to drag him out of the house kicking and screaming. O.K that was a bit of an exaggeration….lets just say it made him feel upset and anxious. I came to the decision that I had to come up with a coping strategy and at the same time try as hard as I could to stick to the routine.
The first words that come out of Alfie’s mouth at the weekends are ‘What are our plans for today?’ If I told him we were doing something, he was ok about it as long as I gave him a few hours warning. If I had to go out early the next day he needed to know the night before. He needs to prepare himself mentally and has to be given enough time to do just that.
On school days as I drive him to school, he always asks if we will be doing anything after school. Most days I just don’t know and so prepare him by saying we may have to go out after school and this seems to do the trick. This way he knows early on in the day that there is a possibility he will have to go out and so prepares himself.
I rarely say ‘no, we are not doing anything’ anymore because it just makes life difficult. However I do try to get things done during school time to make his life easier. I am not sure if it is a bad good thing or a bad thing though.
There will be times in his life when his routine will change and he will have to deal with it.
What do you think?
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